2020 The Unforgettable Year: A Recap

 Happy New Year!! 

Almost 365 days ago, those words were a welcome exclamation. Heck, we had a senior in high school rolling through a phenomenal basketball season, looking ahead to a final semester of high school. We had two kiddos thriving in college, so full of fun stories and adventures. We were busy...with games, friends, date nights, trivia nights, bar nights, full time jobs.  And 2020 held all the promise of even greater things to come. 

JANUARY: I began 2020 with my friends. A perfect way to start. Pick a word, have a party, and celebrate the hope that comes with a new year. 

My word was CULTIVATE. Little did I know that what effort it would take to live that word this year. 

FEB and MARCH: Basketball life... Caleb was having a great season. His team was having an amazing season. Knowing it was his last year for playing, we were soaking in every moment, every three-pointer, every win. These kids had played together for so long that the parents had time to become friends. Two to three times a week, we sat together, just cheering for ALL our kids. 

And then came the whispers... strange flu, sickness, contagious.... what was happening? And then, on the night of a playoff run win, it changed. First, fans in the stands started saying colleges were closing. Then my girls said they would now only attend class online.  College was paused. Word spread that the game in two days was being postponed. The season was paused. So much confusion. So much still unknown. 

But in the front of everyone's mind was keeping these kids and families safe. All we could focus on was staying safe and alive.  

Then the school closings started. 

We had little warning. We only knew we were taking two weeks to teach online, and then we'd come back after Spring Break, after the panic had settled, a plan was in place. The scramble to get kids onto Google Classroom was REAL! Thankfully, our tech teacher was ahead of it all and through tears, taught me how to teach the midkids. We prayed that day...oh how we prayed. I braided hair, we talked, we cried, we prayed. Our goodbye lingered extra long that afternoon. As we sang the benediction as a school, I couldn't help but cry. It all felt so surreal. Walking kids out to parents was eerily quiet. No one wanted to leave this way. But we still held the hope that we would be back in three weeks. 

Easter came. And I lost it. Sobbing in my garage, I just had to have the ugly cry. I couldn't understand this. I couldn't see my kiddos, my parents, my inlaws. We couldn't go to church. We couldn't go to restaurants. Everything was overwhelming. Seeing my own girl in a mask broke me. Little did I know......this would become our normal.

APRIL, MAY: We didn't go back to school. Caleb finished his high school career sitting (or lying??) in front of a computer screen. Was he robbed of those last few months? Definitely. Will it permanently scar him? Probably not. Everyone says, what a great story to tell. I don't think a 17 year old cares about the story....he cares about his basketball season that never ended, his friends he didn't get to say goodbye to. Sure, there is a video of a graduation ceremony buried deep in my email (we didn't watch it) and I got some upclose pics of him being handed a diploma (LHN really did try to make it special) but after 15 years in Lutheran schools, you know it isn't about the diploma, it's about the community. And that can't be replicated virtually no matter how hard you try. But they tried. And he finished. And summer came.

With fresh air came fresh hope that things would get better. Yes, there was talk of testing and tracing. Yes, daily updates became part of who we were, but also, there was just the feeling of tuning out the noise. No one was allowed to turn the news on in this house. We could do our part without hearing it day after day. We carefully made our circle smaller. I tutored from the garage, cleaning incessantly, just to have some normal parts to our life. We visited friends. For our own well being, we HAD to see other people. We redid the kitchen (between tutoring kids...apparently I am most productive when I am super busy!) We played golf. The boys played TONS OF GOLF. Decisions were made to allow Caleb a gap year. If school was only online, with no community in the dorms, we didn't think it was in his best interest to move forward. So he settled into the plan of working hard and holding off a year. In fact, in my world, if you never looked around, you may not have known what was happening in the world. It felt that even though the end of the school year was stolen, summer was salvaged. 

We learned that technology could connect us. Facetime, which always seemed frivolous to me, became a daily occurance. I learned that I could wash dishes, fold clothes, even clean a bathroom with Rachel just chatting away. It became not only my lifeline to those I loved, but it seemed everyone in the world was embracing Zoom and Facetime with sheer enthusiasm.

AUGUST: I couldn't be more proud of our Lutheran Schools, as in August it was determined after hours and hours and hours of meetings, that we could and would open our doors safely for in-person learning. If I never hear "hybrid-synchronous-asynchronous-socialdistance-mandate-protocol" again, it will be too soon. But we did it. We began a new school year, fully masked up and sanitized. But as close to normal as we can possibly get. The kiddos were and are amazing-- they are excited to be there, but they are still their fun silly kidselves. We even gained a couple new ones; my favorite new-to-Lutheran-school story is when, on day 2, I opened my lunch (we eat in the same room with our kids- something that public schools must not do) when all of sudden, one kiddo is staring at my lunch and then at me. When asked what was going on, he replied, "I have just never seen a teacher eat before." Unforgettable joy in a crazy world.

SEPT-OCT-NOV: more of the same, day after day. Temp checks, masks and mask breaks, early bedtimes, quiet weekends. But moving forward all the time. Looking ahead, making plans. 

Caroline started clinicals....in a hospital...in a pandemic. And she faced it head on, brave, and covered in prayer. Rae showed up every day for work...in a nursing home where residents had no visitors, except for her. And she faced it, head on, with a sense of humor that to me seems superhuman, but to her seems ordinary. Caleb provided much needed entertainment at home, keeping Mike company, playing cards for hours, and just being a peaceful calm in the home. Mike arranged a surprise weekend with my best friend. We voted for a future. Oh yes, Thanksgiving was quiet. Christmas was quiet. Another floor got redone and another room got repainted. I kept going to work; Mike occasionally has to teach to an empty classroom. But we are doing it. Always focusing forward. 

So that brings us to the end of 2020. I know there are many small moments I have already forgotten; I know there are many many many moments where fear and sadness took a deep grip on my heart and held on. I know I have cried more this year than in the last 20 combined.  I know in a lifetime, it's just a year. 366 days (darn leap year). Many many things have changed. But through it all, the needed thing remained. 

I thought I would be CULTIVATING relationships and friendships, but God used 2020 to cultivate a deeper appreciation of His word in my heart. Verse after verse, day after day, His word reminded me that this wasn't new to mankind; this wasn't His way, but He would use this to turn hearts and minds to His unchanging promises. 

2020. You're not my favorite. But you led me closer to Him. No matter what this next year holds, He holds us and our plans and our future. And that's actually the best place we can be as we close out one heck of a year. May 2021 have more laughter than tears, more joy than sorrow, and more Jesus. 

xo,

Karla